Well, about 11 months ago I was talking shit and wrote it here >> (If I was Commander ....) <<. I was dissatisfied with the way things were being run and ranted in my own way, here about a 'what if' situation. I was thinking about "what would I do... how would I do it...." few years from now when I stepped up. What I didn't see coming was what happened the following month.
Some of the folks I was 'unhappy' with, with how they managed, were now trying to boot me from the Organization using our bylaws as the basis. I still disagree with how it all went down. I disagree with the follow on 'punishment.' That all being said, I understand a protocol was violated. However, I personally believe a few POS's were simply trying to boot me. The humorous part now is most of them are gone themselves. Good. A House Cleaning was needed. If I see them out in public I doubt I'll even acknowledge their presence. Good Riddens. Bye. See Ya Bitches.
Is what it is. Folks did what they did either because they wanted to fuck me over or they got caught up in the herd mentality. As I've stated before, I admit I was wrong. I violated a protocol I was unaware had been updated literally days prior. My timeline does not jive with the timeline of others during the investigation. Sorry .. I was there. I know when / how I did things. I know why I did what I did. But when the smoke cleared, at the core I fucked up. Done. Past. Obviously won't happen again. Fact of the matter is ..... a discussion with the SAA and/or CC had they done their job here locally, would have brought the same solution, same result .... but ...ten months later, here we are. When the smoke cleared I missed a few rides to Sanctioned events I'd planned. Shit happens. Additionally, got some clarity on how to handle things in the future, circles of trust .. blah blah ..
So, less than a year ago I found myself in a shitty spot. I was pissed beyond a point what many realized. I considered a lot of options, but reminded myself of some of the things I've written about over the years. So, I parked my emotions, waited things out, began planning on how to do additional things beyond my group here locally. Decided how to handle some problem folks. A plan to press on in a positive manner. What I didn't plan on was the situation I'm now in.
Nominated for CC. Wasn't on my radar. Folks have brought it up multiple times the last few months, but I downplayed it. Some have been trying to get me to do this for the last four years. I may not have liked what I saw but I wasn't ready to step up. I travel a LOT. Business travel and personal travel; my job is wherever I go. I take my laptop and cell phone and could work from the moon if AT&T could get their shit together with cell tower service?
Got to tell you ... the last five years have been interesting. My first two years put a smile on my face. Our CC .. hell, most of our CEB, were a lil' wild. Probably too much drinking, too much cussing .. but I dug it. We had the young group .. and the ...um... lets call it the mature group. Basically two cliques. I belonged in the old group, but tried to hang with the young guys. Then after some crazy BS, the chapter ...we ...found ourselves with an immature 'leader' who I thought was a mess, but it sort of worked. Then he and I bumped heads, I didn't back off. Few months later (nothing to do with me), he was out. Threw in his backpatch. My thought? "Fucking Pussy."
Then we had a new 'leader'. Never 100% trusted that one. Always felt like there was a hidden agenda. Some folks don't do well at the top; it goes to their head. I believe this was the case. Then this person came at some ... then me. He failed .... then ... thew in his patch. Gone. My thought? Fucking Pussy. Good news is he took a few other clowns with him.
Since then, we've been ... well .... just sort of staying afloat. Folks have stepped up. Things are getting done. But, deep down something feels off to me. Maybe it's because of the shit that went down with me a few months back. Maybe I'm right. Maybe I'm wrong. But either way ... I've been nominated to step up or shut up.
As I write this ... I believe I'll step up. I've done my resume, with a humorous twist. Yes, the position is a serious one. But .... I'm not that guy. I still work a job and that shit has enough stress. But our chapter ... doesn't need the BS ... the Drama .... we need a group doing good things and enjoying the ride along the way. Some believe I'm the person to step up and make that happen. Problem is... I can't give 100%. But I believe me running at 75% ... 80% . 90% ... full throttle is more effective than what I've seen the last three years. I travel for pleasure and business often. Just need to keep my schedules straight. Keep communications open between key players. Attempt to steer a ship of sorts, in the correct direction? It was pointed out to me 4 plus years ago, the CC doesn't really have any 'power.' Hell, you can't even really vote (I need to double check that fact). Your job is to steer this ship full of all of us Type A crazies and hold on for the ride?
We shall see.... still debating
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